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NumbWhat is this feeling?
I don't understand.
I want to explain
But I don't think I can.
Is it really true?
Am I turning this numb?
It just can't be!
I must feel some!
Why is this happening?
Why can't I feel?
Is this all just a dream
Or is all of this real?
Someone please tell me.
Please help me feel.
I'm so tired of feeling numb.
I just wanna heal.
The pain, the sorrow,
The joy, the tears.
Yes! I want all of them!
Even all the fears!
I'm so wanting,
Longing to feel again.
This curse is so haunting,
It's like a dead end.
So, if I were you,
Be glad you can feel.
Be thankful you're not numb.
At least you are real.
Truth isTruth is i'll never think i'm good enough for you.
I'll always think there's someone out there who'd treat you better
Who wouldn't need fixing or protecting
Someone who wasn't such an emotional roller-coaster
And when you meet that person...
You'll realize what i've always known.
And you'll leave me.
stumbling in the darkness.
a cranium swells like a balloon;
Monstrous thoughts scratching
and scouring for an escape.
A tender cheek lands on a cool surface.
the heavy load is unzipped,
right between the two pastures of hair.
inky black drippings spill out,
staining a virgin blanket of papery snow.
to an unheard rhythm,
the inklings lace
together on a grid of blue.
all jumbled and obscure.
a heart accelerates in a bony cave.
finding and ensnaring wounds like criminals.
tearing them away from their shaded sanctuary;
sadness their only ally.
Brought forth and smeared
on the paper in a heap of red.
from a dismal abyss,
an anguished soul once drenched in
loneliness and misery
has been purged;
exiled from its fleshy cave.
for all the world to see.
I've became something am not.I've became something am not.
I hate you.
I am disappoint in you.
I can't stand you.
I am standing up to you.
I yell at you a lot.
I am not standing up for you anymore.
I don't care about you.
I do not want you around.
I can't help it.
I just can't deal with you people anymore.
Gone, Gone, Everything is Gonegone, gone, everything is gone
even the nightmares have left me to go on
slice, slice, everything is silent
even the shadows leave me in the darkness
to fend for myself
done, finished, tired of trying
too hard to find something that will fight to revive me!
too hard to find something that just isn't there!
insult, injury, there is no hope
no one to save me, no way to cope
even my closest friends are now strangers
liar, liar, you promised you'd be there!
but you're just like the rest - pretending you cared!
and, just like the rest, you've left me as well.
HUMANWe all have problems, it seems to be
We all want something we cannot see
We all feel like we're failures on the inside
But outwardly you hide it like it's some surprise
We look at the cutters like their a mess
They don't know what they want so we all digress
But a problem is a problem whether big or small
And sometimes it's not even a problem at all
Like the child who is crying over a broken toy
Or the little baby laughing who is filled with joy
The mother who lost her very first child
To the teenager who's careless and runs around wild
The world we live in is a crazy disaster
And we are the ones who is its ringmaster
So to those who destroy is and fill it with hate
Damn them to hell along with their mistakes
To the gays and trans and all in between
To the ones hurting and crying with pleas
Love who you want and never be fake
Don't listen to haters for goodness sake
Don't be too hard on yourself, you'll make mistakes
You'll fall in love and have your heart break
You'll have bad habits
Gender asideI want to find the girl that will be by my side through it all.
I want a boy who will stick it out with me in the hardest times.
I want a girl who will hold me close.
I want a boy who will hug me tightly.
I want a girl that I can call "beautiful" because to me she's just that.
I want a boy that I can call "handsome" because he is to me.
I want a girl who is unique and sticks by me.
I want a boy who's different and dedicated.
But all I really want is someone to love me.
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More